As an interior designer, it’s my job to help you love your space.

But here’s the thing about loving where you live- you actually can’t design your way into it. Of course, I believe good design can set the tone for a space, but “good design” in ultimately subjective. What you consider good design may not be what I consider to be good, and that’s okay. That’s the beauty of home.

But because we know that design is subjective and seasons change and trends come and go, there has to be some other grounding, steady factor that makes you love your home- even if it doesn’t look like your Pinterest board. I believe that “thing” is the heart posture we have towards our homes.

It may sound “woo-woo” & “it’s all about mindset”- but there’s a truth to it. No amount of fancy upgrades or designer features are ever going to make you truly, deeply, fully love your home. & I’m preaching this to myself even as I tell you.

You see, we live in a new construction duplex just a few miles from the ocean. Sounds like a dream, right? But in my heart of hearts, I don’t love new construction. I crave the vintagey charm of an old home with a porch & a nice sized backyard. Of course, there are tonsss of benefits to new construction, but vibe just doesn’t do it for me. I’d rather be in a 100-year-old home with creaky hardwoods & a brick sunroom & all the character you just don’t see anymore. Not everyone is going to share that dream (including my husband, lol).

But THAT is why design itself will simply never get you there. Even the highest-end projects have budgets, and when the money runs out, there’s usually still something else to want or need or buy. Whether your dream is a multi-million dollar house or a quaint, cozy vintage cottage, loving where you live is so much deeper.

I believe loving where you live isn’t about Pinterest-worthy finishes & drool-worthy kitchens perfectly styled & ready for an Architectural Digest cover story. It’s about the stories the walls tell & setting up a space with a mindset that balance can be found between form and function.

Practical doesn’t have to be ugly. Beautiful spaces don’t have to be impractical. But neither one will give you the appreciation required to truly love your space, even if it isn’t your dream. Loving your space requires care, kindness, and deep intentionality.

As moms (& women in general), we tend to be the gatekeepers of our homes. We play the leading role in what comes into our spaces, what stays, and what goes out. We often set the stage for ongoing hospitality and a home where everyone, especially the people who live in it, feel safe, comfortable and at peace.

The kicker? That doesn’t happen accidentally. And it doesn’t start when you’re finally in your dream home. It has to start right here, right now, in your less-than-ideal conditions.

This month, I put on a series on my IG stories called the “Love Your Home Challenge”- 28 ways to practice loving your home throughout the month. I’ve listed out these practical steps in another blog (read that one here: ) so that you can come back to them anytime you want and live out loving your home on a daily basis.

Cheers to home!
Hayds